When Is It Time?

When is it time?

When is enough too much? When do we know that whatever the will there is simply no way? When is it no longer mind over matter and all that matters is that the mind has wandered onto an unintended route or the body is taking direction independent of our demands or both are in active revolt against everything we believe we still possess?

When are we no longer the narrator of our own tale and destiny has its own concept of where we are heading?

When do we stop saying tomorrow will be different, will be better? When do we recognize that this is not an aberration but what it is? When does reality become exactly that?

This is the riddle that each of us is tasked with solving and if we get it wrong we run the grave risk of appearing self absorbed, self indulgent, selfish. And whatever we have done before then, whatever our accomplishments, whatever challenges we have risen above, whatever heights we have scaled, all of it can seem so much less significant than that we have chosen wrong in this moment. That we have damaged not only our present but the recollection of our past and the contemplations of our future. That in an instant we have become something, someone who we are not and never intended to be. That our legacy has been altered and all we have worked so long and so hard to achieve has been irrevocably and irreparably stained.

What happens when we lose control of our own narrative?