The President and the Pea

This is the story of an all-powerful ruler (the President) who had no difficulty dealing with those he found without value (the Pea) in any way his imagination allowed.

From his golden castle the President issued insults and directives. He surveyed the landscape of his kingdom and ordered the expulsion of any who did not meet his eye. Many Peas were gathered and removed, through the air, to a land far, far away. To a dungeon where the lights were forever on but it remained totally dark.

On this one night, on this one flight, one of those gathered claimed to be not like the others. For while this one may have looked like a Pea by reason of his tattoos and his color, he almost certainly was not.

But the President said he would decide who was a Pea. And even as he first admitted he scooped up something that merely had all the markings of a Pea but may not have been, later he changed his mind. Yes, this one was definitely a Pea. And, he added, even were that not so, he could not retrieve this one from the dungeon because he did not rule over the land far, far away.

It is now many mornings since that flight took place. And this very troubling tale is not at an end. For now, in the place where the President issues insults and directive, where he treats those he declares to be Peas as Peas, there is a hue and cry. Bring this one home. For even the smallest of the small has meaning and can be as powerful as the President.

Will this story have a happy end? Will this one be returned and reunited with those he holds dear? Will the President lose sleep because the mattress upon which he lays is not of sufficient thickness to withstand the effects of this thorn in his side? Will the kingdom be saved from absolute ruin?

A Pea or not a Pea, that is the question.