Lincoln Weighs In

The 2016 Gotham Tigers, a college football team from southern Missouri was an epically anemic squad. Through the first 8 games of the season they gathered not a single victory. The cumulative tally stood at 48 points for and 243 against.

Their last home contest of the season was against a foe almost equally inept. But a solitary win to show for their efforts. Hope, at least a sliver of it, was to be found in the weeds.

It was not to be. Two fumbles and three interceptions later it was 21 to 0. The home team floundering as always. With but 3 minutes left in the contest, the visitors pushed over a fourth and final touchdown. The extra point added, 21 morphed to 28. Which is where it remained when the final whistle blew.

As the players left the field the crowd erupted in a chorus of boos. Throughout the game they had announced in loud and discordant notes, what they thought of the efforts of the home team. Now there came one crescendo then another and another, round after round, an ocean of contempt. The echoes of despair and disgust remained long after the last combatant had left the field.

In the locker room after the game the beleaguered coach was asked for his assessment of what had transpired. His response became an immediate Sports Center staple.

"I wish we could have just started this game over. You know, four score and seven jeers ago."

The coach was fired the next day.